I have 1 kid that sleeps through the night, unless my 6 year old is sick, or has to use the bathroom, he sleeps all night and gets up early in the morning around 7am unless I wake him for school, then it is 6am. He wasn't always this great of a sleeper. At age 1 1/2-2 he wouldn't go to bed until 1am most nights. This was back when we lived with my in laws ( a story for another time), I would stay up late with him and watch infomercials while rocking him to sleep. When we got our own place, I struggled for months to get him to sleep. Finally I allowed him to take 1 toy from downstairs every night. We closed a baby gate behind him, gave him a night light and told him he could play till he fell asleep. For reasons totally unknown, it worked.
My daughter is 3, at age 9 months she put herself to sleep, at 12months, I weaned her, she still self soothed. BAM! we moved, she stopped putting herself to sleep. I rocked her to sleep. At age 2 she potty trained herself and started putting herself to sleep....oh wait FAIRY TALE.
Sleep is still a battle. She can fall asleep herself, after 1 bowl of cereal, tooth brushing, glass of water, 3 stories, lamp left on so she can read a pile of books, then gets up 6 times to tell us something, and usually wakes her baby sister at least once. I go to bed once I get the 1 year old asleep and yet sometime in the night my 3 year old pops up and needs something.
I am telling you all this, because out there somewhere there is someone who gets it. Someone who has tried sleep training, someone that knows letting the kid in the crib doesn't always work. Someone who knows that moving can fuck up all the best sleepers.
I am TIRED, I suck down cups of coffee everyday so I can be a human. My 1 year old is STILL being nursed, I haven't had the heart to wean her, she's going on 14 months. She doesn't sleep through the night either, she wakes up at least twice...LIE, she really wakes up 3-4 times a night.
These are the things I WISH my parents would have told me, along with potty training, and laundry. Getting the laundry done is another fairy tale, it NEVER happens. Having clean clothes in your closet, not on the floor and clothes that aren't stained are another fairy tale. We haven't really changed the dress code of motherhood, my mom said my Grandma used to wear *Mumus, or a floral printed dress. Simply an excuse not to wear underwear because you don't have any clean. Not too mention with a floral print that large who can find a stain!? A lot of mothers wear yoga pants, I know I do, my jeans are always dirty. Yoga pants are a step above PJ's and somehow became acceptable to wear in public (I try not to wear them in public).
I am not looking for answers. I just know in my heart as a mother, sleep is a fairy tale, sleep comes in the night to those who are weary. Then the weary have children and like thieves, the children awake in the night, stealing the bounty of sleep the weary once had. Laundry, again never is done, kids spill, spit up, poop in there pants and roll in the dirt in the driveway...well at least mine do.
I know Fairy Tales come with parenthood, we pass theses stories on. Stories of kids sleeping through the night, not wetting the bed after being potty trained, never feeding them junk food and letting them watch too much TV. Why?
Deep down we know every kid is different, every person is different, what worked for the 1st kid you had most likely won't work for the 2nd, 3rd or so on down the line. We as parents don't want to look bad, so we lie to our peers, fellow mothers and fathers. If we quit spreading fairy tales, we could better help each other, maybe we all could get a little more sleep.
I quit lying years ago, my daughter isn't weaned, she is 14 months, my son didn't potty train till 1 week before preschool, my oldest daughter is 3, I let her listen to Ozzy Osbourne and chew gum. OH THE HORROR! There are a lot more things that I let my kids do that some would object to. Other things, like not letting them watch TV, or the 6 o'clock news are just a little strict or silly to some.
All I'm saying is that these parental fairy tales are a crock of shit. We need to stop telling stories and instead tell the truth. The truth is, if you want a perfect parent, you've come to the wrong place, I'm just a parent, not a superhero. Now where in the hell is my coffee?
*( See Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Muumuu).
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